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Ten Things I Learned or Had Reaffirmed by Small Time
Crooks:
- New Jersey really IS full of neurotic people.
- Hugh Grant was born to play the sleaze.
- Life should always be accompanied with organ music.
- If you're gonna build your vocab by memorizing the dictionary, start with some letter other than 'A'.
- When attempting to tunnel into a bank vault, hold the map right side up.
- A harp, while ascetically pleasing, does not complete a room, especially if no one in the house plays it.
- Class is not something one can buy; you'll just get swindled and taught snobbery.
- One can learn a significant amount from TV; it might not be useful, but it's learnable.
- New Yorkers love cookies.
- And lastly... the heartwarming, warm fuzzy thought for the day:
- Money is not the main means to happiness. Love is the important thing in life and the means to happiness.
Well, for those of you who've been paying attention to
the Collector Times Review section might have noticed
that all of the sudden, I just dropped off the movie
review radar. It's not that I haven't been doing my
job as a good little Collector Times minion; it's that
my International Baccalaureate and Advanced Placement
testing have been stealing my time away from our
beloved magazine. Anyways, enough about me; let's talk
about the movie.
Small Time Crooks is the latest endeavor of Woody
Allen. Yes, it is rated PG; and NO, this does not
mean it's utterly boring and has no appeal to older
audiences. It's a cute comedy about a
ex-convict (played by Woody Allen) and his ex-stripper
wife (played by Tracy Ullman), who plan a bank heist
and end up filthy rich due to the success of the store
front that's hiding the tunneling to the bank below, a
Cookie Shop. No, unlike Everyone Says I Love You, this
is not a musical, although there is very perky organ
music in the background. It's a great little movie
about the things that really matter, without being
overly saccharine. It's cute, but it's not stomach
turningly so, which is why on the Spiff-O-Meter it
gets an eight overall.
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