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Does this quote send anyone else's BS detector into
overdrive? If this is the case, why were we building
the Titan? Sounds like a good invasion plan to me:
build a new Earth in other species' backyard and then
attack them from it. Sheer tactical genius, don't you
think? The Drej had a right to be worried, if you ask
me. I would have attacked us, too. Why do we need to
create new Earths? Let us be serious people. The
only real reason for the Titan would be to create a
stronghold in someone else's territory. There was no
great humanitarian purpose for the Titan before the
Earth was blown up. I'm not even sure there was a
humanitarian purpose AFTER Earth was space dust. Now,
that I have that little tirade out of the way onto
even greater plot holes and stupidities.
Cale, the main character, was left by his father, the
main engineer of the Titan, during the Drej attack
that destroyed Earth. Cale's father left Cale with
one of his assistants, with a golden ring, and with a
promise that he would come back to Cale. Hmmm...are
we smelling suspiciously similar plot elements yet?
Well, this is partially similar. Cale reacts much
more intuitively than little Anakin does. Little Cale
throws a BIG hissy fit. Cale- 1 Anakin- 0 in the
reality department. Cale also garners a large
resentment against his father, which is later resolved
with way too much ease for my liking. The kid has 15
years to build up all these harsh feelings toward his
father and then a three-minute saved video clip from
his father combined with the toy Cale was playing with
right before Earth was destroyed resolves this
animosity. Puuuuuuuuulease.
Now the golden ring, what up with that? Well as the
plot unravels, the ring is revealed to be a map to
where Cale's father hid the Titan. The map can only
be activated by Cale or his father's genetic
structure. Now plot hole number one with the ring: if
Cale is such a mechanical genius why hasn't he figured
out the secret of the ring before? Plot hole number
two: Now, what would have happened if Cale hadn't made
it out of Earth. I mean there were TONS of ships
destroyed as they escaped Earth. In all honesty what
really were the chances that Cale would get out of
there alive? Also you give a five or six-year-old a
ring and you expect them to hold onto it and not lose
it? What Earth are these people from? Most five or
six-year-olds can't keep track of crayons. But what
plot would you have if the kid had lost the ring, or a
better question what plot does his having the ring
give to the movie?
There are several blatant stolen scenes in this movie.
If you're even a remote science fiction fan, you'll
see the rip from Star Wars: A New Hope. There is
also a scene we've seen quite a bit in various movies;
you'll see it. If you've seen Armageddon, prepare for
a feeling of deja vu ( or so I'm told, I've never seen
the movie. However, I know we've all seen the
" Save yourself kid. You're young; You've got so
much to live for " scene before ). Moreover, the
humor in Titan AE is old and overdone. One can only
hear sub-genius jokes and who's your daddy jokes so
many times before they grow old.
I don't want you to think everything about this movie
is rotten, though. As the trailers and commercials
promise, Titan A.E. is GREAT eye candy. It's
absolutely fabulous eye candy and if that's all you're
looking for I've got a movie for you! The soundtrack
to Titan AE is also magnificent; it blends magically
in with the stunning visuals. However, beautiful
visuals and great music can't compensate for the
gaping holes that plague Titan AE from the first ten
minutes of the movie. Overall Titan AE is getting
spanked very hard for trying too greatly to pander to
the mainstream audience and not bothering to create an
actual plot. Bad script writers, shame on you!
Five on the Spiff-o-Meter.
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