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I'm playing Frank-N-Furter in AggieCon's production of Rocky Horror
Picture Show. I had to wander into the store of the devil in order to find
a plain black garter belt to go with my costume, and I was led to the
conclusion that Victoria's Secret is indeed an evil store. Here's why:
- Their color scheme looks like it was created by Matel for Barbie.
- I wandered around the store looking lost for twenty minutes, and no one
came to help me.
- I had to get in the check out line in order to get someone to help me.
- They hide their garter belts so well that even they have no idea where they
are.
- They stand surrounded by a display of lacy thongs and look at you like
you're a freak when you ask them to help you find a plain black garter belt.
- They have trouble understanding that pink and black is not the same as red
and black.
- I looked at their underwear and noticed they were horribly over priced.
They want 6 bucks for a pair of cotton undies. PLEASE! I buy Sporty
Bikini Cut underwear by Hanes for 4 to a pack for $5.45 at Wal-Mart.
- When you check out they hand you this conspicuous pink and white bag
that just SCREAMS I went naughty lingerie shopping.
- If you're unlucky, they spray the tissue paper they wrap your purchase in
with one of their signature frangrances.
- And last but certainly not least after having to wait twenty minutes and
have them look at you like you're a freak for wanting a black garter belt,
they have the gaul to ask you in a perkily sweet voice if that's all you
were looking for?
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