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Hello! Welcome to Random Thoughts.
This month's column will be short, sweet, and to the point (since I have a half hour until my deadline). It's my own fault, really, but I recently lost someone very close to me, and I hadn't been in much of a writing mood. Luckily, moods change quickly when I'm under pressure, and when my (wonderful, kind) editor has a wide variety of weapons at her disposal.
Without further ado...
"The Top 11 Ways to Tell That Your GM is out to Get You"
- Your party comes across a race called The Kaemislayers. Your character's name is Kaemi.
- You get hit by a monster, and the GM says "Well shoot, if we pool all the dice together, I still don't have enough to roll damage. Do you mind if I just average it out?"
- The GM tells you to roll up a new character, and you haven't even finished rolling up your first one yet.
- The GM bases 90% of his stories on B Horror movies, and you always play the quirky, yet quiet outsider.
- He throws alot of what looks like crumpled up notes at you. When you flatten them out to read them, they're blank character sheets.
- Your high level party comes across an army of a thousand goblins, and the GM makes you play it out.
- He makes you roll for autonomous functions, like breathing and heartbeat.
- Your GM's name is Mike.
- He often uses the phrase "Well, I haven't killed anybody THIS round . . ."
- . . . while staring right at you.
Aaaaand . . . the number one way to tell your GM is out to get you . . .
- You just finish up a two hour long battle where the party survived by the skin of their teeth, and the GM says "Well, that was great. A great example of what WOULD have happened, had that monster not killed you all in the second round."
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