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Every magazine with editorial content written by
bloggers with pretensions of legitimate journalism
does a section every year where one of their
"reporters" make New Year's Resolutions. The
smarter or at least less lazy ones, will then attempt
to wake those reporters up from their nap a year later
to see how things are coming along. I think between
the nasty computer worm and the last minute Martian
Death Flu, I drew the short end of the stick. This
year the plumb assignment comes to me. Though if
garbage like this is good enough for inferior papers
like "The Wall Street Journal" and "The New York
Times" and top notch news outlets like Mad Magazine
and McDonalds's Fun Times, I'm not in bad company.
Especially since Mad once put award winning
correspondent Sergio Aragones on this type job. And
who could forget the commentary: "New Year's- Robble
Robble- Humbug- Robble Robble by Pulitzer Prize
winning author Hamburgler?"
Hey, if I remember and aren't lazy, I might
even actually dig this up next December and have
something to save my ass when I think I'm going to
miss deadline.
My resolutions
1) I will not buy any more books until I finish at
least half of the books I already have. No, not
comics or trade paperbacks or gaming manuals. I mean
books. You know, those big thick things made of paper
with no pictures. Sort of like this article but much
longer. Which means getting through Anansi Boys,
Fragile Things, The Graveyard Book, Heroes in
Training, The Once and Future King, The Guilded Age,
A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, Watership
Down, Folk of the Air, Train Man, Wyrd Sisters,
Lords and Ladies, Witches Abroad, Carpe Juguluum,
The Fifth Elephant, Night Watch, Thud!, Going Postal,
Making Money, Mort, Reaper Man, Soul Music, a couple of Star
Trek books, Heroes: Saving Charlie and The Midshipman
Hornblower. Some of those were Christmas gifts. Many
came from the local Borders's closing sale and I even
I have to admit I might have gone a little bit
overboard on the Discworld.
I guess I should just come out and say it...
My name is Jess and I'm a Pratchettaholic.
2) Finish two of my three short stories or get to
the half way point on my novel. Really, it shouldn't
be that hard with an inert social/gaming life and no
girlfriend. Sure there is the two and half hours two
and from work plus 8 hours at work problem. If
something is important you can make the time. If I
can crank out a fairly close to finished product
version of the first chapter of "The League of
Explorers" in less than a week, I can do anything.
(Gratuitous plug.)
3) Stop MST3King good movies with Dad. My dad and I
have been known to riff good movies. I don't just
need good recent movies either. I'm talking real
classics. And not "Karate Kid" or "Space Camp"
classics. I think that given the chance we might
actually riff on "Touch of Evil" or Chaplin's "Little
Dictator."
4) I think after 12 years I should probably get the
Freakazoid theme out of my head.
And finally,
5) Get into the Guinness Book of World Records for
most times through "The Song That Never Ends".
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