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Dear Mr. Higginson,
About your article appearing in the April 2012 of Collector Times. Tom, Dick and Harry all running for mayor at the same time would be a disaster. You see while unemployed I've had very little to do other than watch reruns of 3rd Rock from the Sun. On the surface Tommy would appear to be the obvious choice. He has a brain in his head. He's probably aged quite a bit since the series ended and had to time to get those wild and crazy hormones out of his system. However- women weren't his only weakness. He had a real problem dealing with bullshit. Now the American People claim that's what they want in a politician. In actual practice this has never worked on a large scale. Jesse Ventura was a joke. Rahm Emmanuel got elected but what has he done lately. Even Al Franken lost his snarky attitude and become a reasonable person once elected. Not to mention politics is the art of the possible which means he'd have to deal with 20 tons of bullshit a day. He has a lot of problems reading social cues. If he weren't an alien cube and I were a psychiatrist I would probably diagnose him with Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder- Inattentive type. A Harry administration would be a quagmire. Add all of Tommy's weakness and ad the brains of an onion. Calling him an idiot is an insult to idiots everywhere. The man doesn't even know how to open his eyelids. As for Dick- he may have a war record as a leading high commander but he's terrified of Jell-O, spiders and Dr. Albright. Plus, he takes his orders from William Shatner which makes him a pawn of the Canadian Government. So if I had to vote for who was actually best for the job, I'd have to vote for Sally. She's not running and wouldn't take the job. She has a hard enough time looking after Tom, Dick and Harry to worry about the rest of us. On the national level, someone who is both qualified and who would actually want to be president comes along maybe three times in a century. Most of the time the American people aren't smart enough to know who they are until 40-100 years after the fact. I know how I'm voting in November. That's never been in question. Is my candidate the best for the job? Only out of the people running. I'm still not running my own campaign for 2016.
Tuesday April 3rd is primary day in Maryland. My original plan was to vote for whichever congressional candidate did not robocall my house. Unfortunately that is no longer possible. They have all called me in the last twenty minutes it took to write this. Now I have to judge them on the issues rather than whether or not they interrupted my shower, dinner or evening replay of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Not that I remained uninformed. I just see not calling my house five times in one evening a sign of simple basic respect. If a candidate doesn't respect me, they shouldn't get my vote. One call the night before and election I can understand. Beyond that is just kind of dickish.
Sincerely,
Jess Willey
This message is not endorsed by The Committee to Elect Jesse Willey for President.
Hi Jesse,
Fortunately, or unfortunately (depending on how one wishes to see things), I haven't been unemployed for over 31 years, long before "3rd Rock From the Sun" premiered on television. Consequently, I've been deprived of the opportunity to acquaint myself with the characters thereof, and did not have them in mind at all when I wrote the April column. In truth, I was showing my age, in harkening back to a very old cliche for bandwagon behavior, in which one would say that, "Every Tom, Dick, and Harry, is (fill in the blank)."
Now, while it may seem that Tom, Dick, and Harry, is a close set of pseudonyms for Ron, Mitt, and Barry, and while the principles certainly apply to the Presidential race that appears to be shaping up right now, I was quite serious in my assertion that I was discussing elections at all levels. Harry could just as easily be Raul Grijalva here in Tucson, and I do believe there are at least a couple of Republican contenders vying in the primaries to challenge him for his Congressional Seat in November. One might be tempted to vote for the lesser qualified of the Republicans, thinking that person would be more likely to unseat Grijalva, than a better qualified candidate. In the race for the seat vacated by Gabrielle Giffords withdrawal from office, there are several people jockeying for the office, from both parties. Alas, Joe Sweeney has passed away, so his perpetual candidateship will be missed this year, and I'm sure he would have thrown his hat into the ring for one of those offices (imagine Shemp from the original Three Stooges on a political poster, pasted to a dumpster, and you have Joe Sweeney's typical campaign tactic. Sweeney looked a lot like Shemp, though I think Shemp would have stood a better chance of winning.)
What distresses me, though, is how often it seems that we have races, all over the country, where Tom is the best qualified, Harry is the least liked, but Dick is the favored to beat Harry, so he gets the votes. Our current roster in both State and Federal legislatures bears this out, for how else could we explain why there are so many Dicks in our government?
History has shown us, you can be a Tom, or you can be a Harry, but if you really want to get elected, you have to be a Dick. Politics just seems to suck them in for some reason, and we Americans sure must like our Dicks.
I don't know about you, but I'm getting kind of tired of voting for Dicks.
Thanks for writing, and I'm wondering if Sheryl will actually run this reply on the Letters page . . . :D
Rick
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