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This month I'm centering my article around Asian
b-movies. Why? Just because I'm cool like that...
so all you Takashi fans, fasten your safety belts.
rip off your arms, and strap on your bazooka's
because this is what you're in for: 1. A review of
Battle Royale, a crazy japanese satire about a
high school class forced by the government to
battle it out on a deserted island, BATTLE
ROYALE! 2: Another hard to find Japanese
action flick by the genius behind Audition,
Takashi Miike's Dead Or Alive. 3. And last but
not least, also by Takashi Miike (pronounced
Me-kay), Audition, a morbid tale of a man who
is going through a midlife crisis and pays for it
with his life. American Beauty's got nothing on
this one.
BATTLE ROYALE was brought to my
attention at the Fantasia Film Festival when an
acquaintance of mine asked me to ask the guy in
charge of booking movies why they hadn't gotten
Battle Royale. It seems this little gem had been
raising quite an uproar in Japan for having lots
of gore in it. I asked and he explained that by the
time it had come out, they had already booked
too many movies.
The movie revolves around a grade nine high
school class. Just an average class, with boys
and girls, bullies, athletes and lovers that are
chosen by the government to be placed on a
deserted island against their will with necklaces
wired with explosives placed on their necks. As
they awake, the majority are scared/confused
and want an explanation, who better then their
grade 7 teacher? Why not the grade 9 teacher,
you ask? Just because they decided to kill him.
So he explains to them that they have been
chosen by the government to play this game and
that they should all feel very lucky. So here are
the rules, the game lasts 3 days. After three days,
if there is more then 1 survivor, they all die.
They are all given a big green bag with food,
clothes and a weapon. The weapons are chosen
at random and vary from forks, pot lids, guns,
crossbows, paper fans, etc.. Only 1 survivor may
leave the island alive, and only once all his/her
classmates have been murdered. They are then
released into the compound/island and have
danger zones assigned to them every few hours
where the ones who want trouble head to and the
ones who want to try to live the longest run away
from. There's a basic premise for ya!
This movie's got it all.. blood, guts, love,
suicide, crazy guy with a machine gun.. all the
stuff a films gotta have these days! I popped the
tape in my VCR expecting to enjoy my next 2
hours. What I didn't know is that I'd be telling
people about this movie for days to come and
even after that! Holy Crap! The movie only takes
15 minutes to get started, and it's not hard to
understand, either. The subtitles were done
nicely but are sometimes blanked out because the
copy I have is a bootleg copy from the laser disc
that I got off ebay! Kudos ebay! As far as acting
skills, I can't really tell.. just because they're
speaking another language. A line I read in
another review for this film that caught my eye
and might catch all you b-movie fans out there
is/was, "Lord of the Flies Meets Riki-oh(gory
"kung fu" film") in this high paced thriller".. I am
a big fan of Riki-oh and have always liked the
premise of Lord of the Flies, put them together
and you get Battle Royale! (Look for it in
upcoming film festivals or buy a copy off ebay!)
DEAD OR ALIVE, a simplistic Yakuza based
Japanese action film? Of course not! This is
Takashi Miike were talking about, this movie is
a classic! Holy boy chits! The movie follows
two characters, Ryuichi - a tall, big, mean,
badass mobster dude working for the Yakuza.
Detective Jojima - The good cop who's out to get
the bad guys no matter what. The story starts
with the usual gang fights, Yakuza causes ruckus,
another gang causes ruckus. Takashi has a way to
go into the weird, even if its not necessary,
where one of the scenes shows two mobsters
forcing a member of the opposite gang to pose in
homosexual nude positions while they take
pictures and giggle, in come Mr. Detective to
save the day, he kicks some ass and leaves. This
premise pretty much repeats its self over and
over until halfway through the film, throw in
some questioning, family stories (the gangster
has a family - the cop has a family.). Old man
Yakuza (not his name, but thats what I call him
cuz he's the leader of the Yakuza) gets a
prostitute and forces her to drown in a pool of
her own... excrement, Goodfellas hasn't even
touched this one. But the thing that truly
highlights this movie is the ending! Oh my god!
No ending in a movie has surprised me as much
as this one! The ending to this film is just so out
of place and so hilarious while at the same time
being totally entertaining, I wish I could share it
with you, but I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise.
AUDITION was absolutely one of the most
screwed up films I've ever seen in my life!
Honestly! Miike is just a crazy fellow and this
movie proves it. This one is the easiest to find of
his movies or at least, easiest to see, since it's
actually had a run in repertoire theaters around
America and is actually out for purchase in the
UK, so some of you might have seen it. The story
follows this middle aged man whose wife dies
of some terminal disease (they never specify) in
front of him and their son. Eight years later they
show that he's doing fairly well for himself and
his son is doing well, also. The son mentions to
his Father Shigeharu that he should find a girl
before he gets too old for anyone to fall for him.
This surprises Pops because one of the main
reasons he didn't want to re-marry is the fear of
upsetting his son. He goes to see his friend
who's a big movie producer and tells him he
wants to find someone. His friend sets up an
audition for a TV show, asking for a girl in their
20-30s. He gets all their resumes and all that and
selects 30 that he might like, but right away he
picks one specifically and sticks to that one. He
asks her out on a couple of dates and breaks it to
her that she didn't get the part, they fall in love,
and then the audience is tricked into believing
that this is just a normal romantic little film. One
night, while out of town in a hotel, Shigeharu and
Asami (thats the girl) are talking and he admits
to her about the whole audition. It doesn't seem
to bother her though, She asks him to get in bed
with her... this is when the movie gets weird.
Shigeharu is knocked out and when he wakes up
the girl is gone!! So he goes around trying to find
hints as of where she went, from her old ballet
school to the bar she used to work at, winding
down to the craziest conclusion back at his
house. Find this movie, you must!! Any horror
fan will love this film. Takashi Miike is a
badass.
I'd be glad to talk about any of the films with
peeps who are interested, so go ahead and email
me! I don't know whats in store for next month,
but hopefully it'll be good! I have 5 movies to
watch tonight alone, so maybe I'll chose one of
those. Till next week, this is the friendly
neighborhood lunatic saying, "Inward singing is
the most powerful tool in singing since
yodeling!". Happy Birthday to whoever's
birthday it is.
Nny
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