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Unfortunately, I haven't had much time to draw,
recently and so I don't have any art for my column
this month. On the other hand, this allows me to
stretch my descriptive powers a bit.
I had some ideas for a column on Superman Returns
spin-offs or sequels. I and many others have been
waiting a long, long time for a decent Supergirl
movie, so I'd love to see that come to fruition.
Especially if they ignored the execrable 80s
Supergirl. As good as Helen Slater looked in the
costume, that movie was simply too awful for words.
Were I in charge, I'd try to borrow a bit from the
Superman and Justice League animated series versions
of Supergirl. Not only was she a strong character, the
origin in the Animated DC Uninvers was excellent. I
never really bought into that idea that an entire city
got blasted off the surface of Krypton and nobody was
killed by the massive accelleration forces, or dies
gasping in airless space, or that it had a convenient,
air-tight, near-indestructable dome over it. It was
weak, that's all. If you can't go for Argo being a
sister planet to Krypton, how about a space platform
cast adrift by Krypton's destruction?
One thing I will say for Superman Returns, Singer
managed to clarify the destruction of Krypton. It
wasn't the planet that did the Big Firework, it was
Krypton's star that went supernova and blasted Krypton
into glowing, radioactive smithereens. In this
scenario, Argo city as an outpost in interplanetary
space works very well. Then, in a star system swarming
with deadly kryptonite, the outpost slowly dies, until
one little girl is resuced from her dying home,
rocketed to Earth in an experimental starpod under the
tutelage of Argo City's trusty A.I., affectionately
called "Brainiac".
Of course, there really should be a
Superman/Supergirl crossover. Movies produced
simultaneously, like Kill Bill or something. This
makes Brainiac an ideal adversary. Maybe with a nod to
the classic Luthor/Brainiac team, thrown in.
I was thinking about villains for future Superman
movies and the problem is, too many of Superman's
villains are just too damn silly to work on the big
screen. Mxyzptlk, Toy Man, the Prankster...they belong
to the Silver Age and have no place in the cinematic
Superman. On the other hand, some later Superman
villains would work, both visually and to provide an
excuse for action. Especially Mongul and the Parasite.
Metallo and the Atomic Skull could provide interesting
diversions before the big battles at the end with the
real villains.
You might guess that I am just a bit tired of Lex
Luthor. You'd be right. On Smallville, rarely a week
goes by without a fair dose of the Bald One. In the
movies, there has been no other credible adversary for
Superman. I admit to liking Bryan Singer's and Kevin
Spacey's prison-hardened Luthor. This gave him an edge
he lacked before. But, honestly, I'd like to see some
evidence that there are real super-villains in this
world. Ultimately, I'd like to see the Ultra-Humanite
show up. He did start out as a Superman villain, after
all, didn't he? Widely regarded as the very first
super-villain, in fact. Since Luthor is already the
bald super-genius of the movies, let's have the
Humanite in his giant, mutant ape form!
The Parasite offers a wide variety of special effects
that would look great on the big screen. Especially
the later, morphing version of the Parasite. Parasite
often stood toe-to-toe with the Man of Steel and while
I don't think he'd be good enough to carry a film,
he'd make a good soldier-villain for the Humanite to
throw at Supes. Parasite should be purplish and sickly
looking, normally, but fleshed out and robust after
he's "fed".
As for Mongul, this guy has been a hit since he first
appeared in DC Comics Presents #27 and became the
first villain in decades who was able to match
Superman's raw strength and invulnerability. Superman
was forced to fight harder than ever before, just to
hold his own against the yellow-skinned conqueror.
Also, if we get Mongul in on the movies, we might, one
day, get a movie version of "For the Man Who Has
Everything."
As a movie alien, Mongul should be more monstrous
than in the comics. He's too human-looking in the
comics and the animated series, it's time to make him
truly alien, but still keep him recognizable. Make him
7 feet tall or something.
I'm sure some people want to see Doomsday, but not
me. I hated Doomsday in the comics and only enjoyed
the animated version because he/it wasn't portrayed
the way he/it was, in the comics. It never sat well
with me that this upstart, this unknown, got the kill
Superman. That right belongs to Luthor and Brainiac,
who've earned it.
I wish I had time to do some sketches, but my new job
is taking its toll.
See ya next time...
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