Over the past six months I've developed quite an addiction to Marvel Essentials. I have at the time this sees print seventeen of them. I noticed that while he isn't the main character in all them, Spider-Man appears at least once in every single volume of the Essentials I own. (Even Werewolf by Night and Howard the Duck.) By the time this sees print, I will have read every issue Amazing Spider-Man between #1-160, Marvel Team-Up Vol. 1 #1-51 and Spectacular Spider-Man Vol. #1-30. I've noticed a lot of lines or ideas get reused a lot. Which makes perfect material for a drinking game so grab a volume of The Essential Spider-Man and----
---- Warning, the author of this document is obviously an idiot. The Collector Times does not take responsibility for the drunken black outs, alcohol poisoning and death that are likely to occur if you are dumb enough to actually try this. - The Management.
--- Hey, anyone who'd actually follow the drinking game rules are looking for those things. They deserve what they get. - Jess.
The rules-each item will have parenthesis next to it. If the item is a number of sips, drink that number of sips. If it says chug finish your drink.
If Flash Thompson
- calls Peter Parker a wimp or a coward. (One Sip)
- makes a joke about "He'd rather spend his Friday with his test tubes/microscopes than a girl." (Two Sips)
- Says Peter could never be half the man Spider-Man is. (Two Sips)
- If the panel is done with a symbolic half-Peter/half-Spider-Man shot (chug.)
- If a villain shows up he thinks Peter 'probably ran off in fear' or 'is hiding in terror'. (Three Sips)
If any of Peter's love interests
- tells off Flash Thompson for being an insensitive jock (One sip)
- has also dated Flash Thompson. (One Sip)
- and Harry Osborn (Two sips)
- is related to one of the villains goons (one sip)
- is related to the villain. (two sips)
- dated the villain (chug)
- falls for Peter in spite of treating him like dirt for five issues (chug)
- Same as above but for ten issue (chug twice)
- more than fifty issue (finish the whole bottle)
If Spider-Man
- gets into a fight with another hero (One sip per hero)
- and one of them is mind controlled (One sip)
- and it's Johnny Storm (Two sips)
- says "or it is bye-bye Spidey." (Two sips)
If Spider-Man is caught in a trap and escapes by:
- some clever use of web fluid (One Sip)
- and it involves clinging to the villain (Two sips)
- By thinking of how his death would hurt Aunt May and just blindly smashes stuff (chug)
If Aunt May
- is kidnapped by the villain (One sip)
- is attacked by the villain (Two sips)
- is hit on by the villain (chug)
- has a mysterious ailment (One Sip)
- and Peter has to decide between helping her and catching the bad guy (Two sips)
- mentions how sweet a girl she thinks Mary Jane is. (One Sip)
- and Peter already has girlfriend. (Two sips)
- tells Peter "you know how frail you are" (One sip)
- calls someone a pussywillow (two sips)
- gets some other figure of speech wrong (three sips)
If Peter
- thinks "I'd show him (Flash Thompson and/or Harry Osborn) but that would mean revealing that I'm actually Spider-Man" (one sip)
- tries to correct to Aunt May (one sip)
- ends up getting something wrong because of Aunt May (two sips)
- tells Aunt May to stop playing football (three sips)
- Convinces J. Jonah Jameson to pay for some really expensive trip for some adventure. (One sip)
- and Peter gets pictures of Spider-Man (Two sips)
- and Jonah doesn't even comment on why Spidey was there. (Three sips)
If Jonah
- has thougt bubble indicating the photos he bought from Peter are worth twice to four times what he paid. (One sip)
- declares Spider-Man a menace. (Two sips)
- calls Spider-Man cowardly. (Three sips)
- gets in an argument with Robertson (One sip.)
- and it's about politics (Two sips)
- and Jonah mentions Spider-Man for little or no reason. (Chug)
If any long time supporting cast member
- Calls J. Jonah Jameson "all heart." (Sip)
- If character above was Peter (Two Sips)
- If character two about was Robertson (Chug)
- says, "It's you! But how . . ." (Sip)
- turns out to be the villain's secret identity the whole time. (Chug)
Misc.
- If the villain feels compelled to tell Spidey their origin (Sip)
- If origin story helps him defeat the villain. (Two sips)
- If the villains origin involves the intervention of J. Jonah Jameson (Chug)