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You may have noticed lately that Hollywood seems to be suffering a drought of new ideas. Remakes of old movies, and big screen adaptations of old television shows, have become a staple of the cinema. It makes me wonder, though, how they choose which remakes to make. This month, I'd like to share my Top Ten List of old television shows that I'm surprised they haven't made into a modern movie.
Yes. I'm taking a cue from my son-in-law, who once said that, when you don't have any good ideas, do a Top Ten list. I admit it. It's crunch time, and I'm not sure what else to write about.
Starting out this list, which is in no particular order, is the ever-classic "Gilligan's Island." Running only four seasons, from 1964 through 1967, followed by a couple of made-for-television movies, the campy series about seven oddball castaways trapped on a deserted island became a pop-culture phenomenon. Sherwood Schwartz, the creator of the series, tried to duplicate the formula in an old west setting with 1973's "Dusty's Trail." Also starring Bob Denver as the lovable but bungling assistant, "Dusty's Trail" was just "Gilligan's Island" in a wagon train. It lasted one season, and is all but forgotten now. Gilligan, however, is still branded on our collective memory, almost 45 years after the series was ended. It's amazing, therefore, that a modern big screen adaptation isn't already in the works.
Second on my list is a show that absolutely captivated my imagination as a child, "Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea." Part science fiction, part military drama, and part spy-thriller, this undersea series from Irwin Allen was derived from Allen's 1961 Theatrical release of the same name, and ran from 1964 through 1968. The submarine "Seaview" was both a weapon of détente and a research vessel, and I'm sure I wasn't the only kid around that wanted to join the Navy when I grew up, because the idea of being on submarine with big picture windows in the front was just too awesome. With concerns for the environment and international intrigue looming so large in the world's eyes these days, a new story involving the Seaview would fit the market very well.
Our third entry is also from Irwin Allen, running from 1968 through 1970. "Land of the Giants" offered the audience a scenario of a commuter spacecraft, the Spindrift, that somehow gets shunted off to another world, similar to Earth, but where everyone is over ten times larger than us. The passengers and crew of the Spindrift end up trying to keep from getting captured by the totalitarian regime ruling this world, while hoping to repair their ship and get home. If Allen's "Lost In Space" was a good fit for a modern remake, "Land of the Giants" seems like it should follow right behind.
It seems almost ludicrous that our fourth series hasn't been translated to the big screen, since it was one of the longest running television series in history. "Gunsmoke" ran from 1955 through 1975 in prime time, a continuous run that I believe has only been surpassed by "The Simpsons." The world likes shows where a good guy somehow manages to triumph over evil, and Marshall Dillon was the everyman who stood for law and justice in a wild town. Heck, they could tool a Gunsmoke movie into "Die Hard" in the old west.
Our fifth show aired in the 1966-67 season, lasting just the one year. "It's About Time" capitalized on the burgeoning space program, which at that time was sending the two-man Gemini capsules into orbit. The premise of the show is that one of these capsules breaks the speed of light and ends up back in the time of dinosaurs and cavemen. Okay, even then, science insisted that dinosaurs and humans never co-existed, but it was a television comedy. To a seven year old kid already fascinated with dinosaurs, this series was incredible. Retool it for today, add Spielberg's special-effects a la "Jurassic Park," and we have the formula for a comedy thriller.
At number six is the quintessential family series. "Lassie" also ran for 20 years, from 1954 through 1974, and single-handedly made people believe that standard collies were the smartest dogs on the face of the Earth. People love dogs, and people love good dog movies. Lassie has already been made into theatrical release movies, but not in many years. The downside to this, though, would be a sudden resurgence in the popularity of collies, followed by a glut of collies left at animal shelters when people discover that their untrained, undisciplined puppy didn't grow into a brilliant, well-behaved dog.
For our seventh idea, we turn to the always-popular spy thriller genre, with "The Man From U.N.C.L.E." The show ran from 1964 through 1968, and was every bit as serious as "Get Smart" was silly. Getting away from real agencies like the CIA or the KGB, U.N.C.L.E. pitted the agents of the titular agency against the fictional THRUSH organization. As I recall, U.N.C.L.E. was a multi-national organization, which would allow a new movie to explore different issues than many of the modern spy-thrillers, without having to interpret the CIA or another real organization through the lens of the filmmaker's biases (good or bad).
Our eighth series is one that is still remembered fondly by an entire generation of divers and diver-wannabes. "Sea Hunt" brought the relatively new sport of scuba onto the small screen from 1958 through 1961, and made Lloyd Bridges into a household name. Between Bridges' "Mike Nelson" character, and "The Undersea World of Jacques Cousteau," diving went from something that military commandos did, to something that appealed to everyday people. Watching old "Sea Hunt" episodes, comparing the equipment used back then to modern scuba gear, is to find a true appreciation for the pioneers of the sport.
Sharing the number nine position are the closely tied series, "CHiPS" (1977 - 1983) and "Emergency!" (1972 - 1979). While CHiPS followed the adventures of two California Highway Patrol motorcycle officers in the Los Angeles area, Emergency followed two paramedics in the same area, with (as I recall) one or two crossover episodes. Either one would work for Hollywood's delight with "buddy movies," and they could easily go with either a serious drama, or a comedy take. Considering how they tackled "Starsky and Hutch," I'd put money on the comedy option.
Finally, capping the list at number ten, is one of the most off-the-wall comedies to ever grace the small screen. "Green Acres" was spun off from "Petticoat Junction" in 1965, and ran through 1971. More than just a "fish out of water" comedy, Green Acres put the educated and idealistic New York attorney, Oliver Wendell Douglas into more than just small town America. Hootersville was more like something out of the Twilight Zone, where the ludicrous was regarded by the locals as normal, and the only one that seemed to notice anything was out of the ordinary was Oliver himself. Even Oliver's socialite wife, who hated the small town environment and wanted to return to the cosmopolitan life in New York City, found the outrageous situations to be perfectly reasonable. This made for many hilarious scenarios, and with the right script and cast, could be the comedy of the decade. Forty years later, the original series still plays well, and in this writer's opinion, was one of the funniest television series ever made.
That's my list, and while it's not a suggestion list saying that they SHOULD make these series into movies, based on what Hollywood has been doing in recent years, these shows seem like reasonable candidates for big screen adaptations. It'll be interesting to see in the next few years, which ones also occur to the movie studios as worthwhile.
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