Tori Amos PNC Bank Arts Center August 22, 2003 Yeah, you heard me. I went to see Tori Amos. Go on, get in the shower. I don't want you stinkin' up the place now that you've soiled yourself. I'll wait. OK. I went to the venue to unload the 2 tickets I'd bought as a favor to someone who, for reasons that shall remain undisclosed but are probably well-known to a few of you, no longer could accept them. Anyway, I get there, and there's NOBODY there. I mean fucking NOBODY. I've never seen the Arts Center this empty on the night of a show, not even at Weird Al earlier this summer. And, of course, the people who were there all seemed to have extra tickets that were much better than my lawn seats. The venue was giving out free upgrades to anyone with lawn seats. There were even these two girls who showed up with no money who ended up with a PILE of Section A tickets somehow. (I don't wanna know how, either.) So, as I'm trying to unload these totally unwanted tickets, someone I run into is like "I have a 20th row ticket here, and I can't give it away." I was like "Fine, fuck it, someone out there really wants me to fucking see Tori Amos for some fucking reason", and said "Fuck it, man, I'll take it." I finally unloaded my crappy seats like 10 minutes before she went on, (mercifully) missing Ben Folds. I go in, sit down, and laugh for about the first 3 or 4 songs, just because of the sheer "what the fuck am I doing here?" factor. Her set actually held momentum for maybe the first 35-40 minutes, surprisingly. Her rhythm section really helped her here, particularly her drummer, Matt Chamberlain (guy's an amazing drummer, totally on the money). Then, she had to go and shoo them away and start with her solo piano crap and totally kill the flow of the set. From there, it was just a matter of waiting for her to stick a fork in herself for the next hour and 20, hour and 25 minutes. Nothing she played was technically unsound or anything like that. It just DRAGGED. And DRAGGED. And DRAGGED. Even when the band came back, the show never really regained steam. I kept almost leaving, and then being like "fuck it, I'm here, what am I gonna do if I leave, go home and sit on the computer?" and sticking around, hoping for her to do something compelling that she never got around to doing. Ah well. I was out of my house on a Friday night, right? For those who hadn't figured this out by now, I've never been a huge Tori Amos fan. In fact, there were a good number of years where, buoyed by a number of girlfriends who were obsessed with her, my hatred for her music knew no boundaries. Then, probably around when "From The Choirgirl Hotel" (which is generally when "fans" think she started to decline, from what I hear...) came out, she started doing some music that I didn't hate. I actually think disc one of "To Venus And Back" (which regularly makes her devotees cringe) is a really solid album. She did some things that were pleasing to my ears on there, even if that meant ripping off Curve like all the other girls do now. Of course, Tori completely ignored the record last night. I'm reasonably sure she did a lot from her past 2 records, because I've heard the first 6 albums at some point or another, and a good deal of her set wasn't recognizable to me. A few of her "hits" made token appearances, but mostly, it was this stuff that I didn't even remotely recognize that was just . . . there. Overall: OK, I did it. And I did it in seats that some of you would KILL for. Please, never make me do it again, unless it's REALLY important to you, and if it is, you're going to have to come see Loverboy with me or something. And NEVER, EVER say I haven't given her a chance.

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Copyright © 2003 Scott Crawford