Hi again! Thank you for stopping by. Nate here, and boy am I glad
that someone is still reading this column! Let me start by wishing
everyone a happy new year.
Man, I hate opening paragraphs. Anyhow, I'm back with another
look at the past month in gaming. And, as promised, I figured out
exactly why I'm so surly. See, for the fifth year in a row, my
Christmas list had the same two items on it. And, once again, I didn't
get either one! So, I have to conclude that I'm on the Naughty List.
Now, if you watch just about any movie or TV show, you can see that
naughty people are mean! So, because I'm on the naughty list, I'm a
meanie. Personally, I always thought being on the naughty list would
be more fun than this.
Enough of that. On to the good stuff.
I failed to include Decipher () in the first
Surly gamer column. I didn't notice anything new from them last month.
This probably has something to do with the fact that they can't even
set a rough target date that's more than six weeks away with any
accuracy. Anyhow, it is important to never cut Decipher any slack,
because the first thing they'll do is start dumping their overstock,
by repackaging it and including one new card. My poor, sweet, innocent
brother was lured into buying one via his love of Ben Kenobi. I took a
look at these cards, and they are UGLY. Decipher must imediately fire
their art department, or at least send them back to art school for a
good long time.
I wanted to mention Battlebooks again, because I finally got a
chance to inspect one. The first wave of these was incomplete, and
a bit less than a month late. The paper stock is really shoddy for a
four dollar comic book. The art is really rancid, and possibly
painful, if stared at for too long. Therefore, it is my proud duty to
cast Battlebooks into the Suckmosphere, a place of unparallelled
sucking. If you actually care enough to read more about these little
monstrosities, visit
As soon as I go and say one nice thing about a product, fate
makes me regret it. The folks who make the Babylon 5 strategy game
have decided that the cheaper version of their new product, a simple
book, must be released two months after the more complex (and
expensive) boxed set! This may be due to some sort of money problem,
which is barely mentioned on their web page:
I think I see a pattern developing. After that nice paragraph
last month about the best game company on the planet, Cheapass Games
(www.cheapassgames.com), I put in an order for some Christmas
presents. And, sure enough, two weeks later, I get a package in the
mail with a tiny slip of paper, saying that they can't deliver my
product yet. Their webpage mentions a paper shortage. Now I have to
face my sweet little siblings on Christmas morning with NOTHING...
<enter handsome man>
SIBLINGS: Oh boy! Nate! Merry Christmas! What'd you get us?
NATE: Sorry, beloved siblings. The printers were out of paper, so
my prepaid order for your Christmas gift was not filled. There will be
no Christmas this year.
<Big, innocent eyes fill with tears>
NATE: Well, since it is Christmas, let me make it up to you by
letting you help me burn that printer to the ground!
SIBS: Yay! We love you, Nate!
...LOOK AT THAT! I just became a CRIMINAL because these people
can't run a business straight! Argh!
Finally, I wanted to end this column with another good solid
recommendation, like last month. I even had one in mind, complete with
a really flattering (if a bit overzealous) paragraph all ready to go,
about the new set for the Babylon 5 card game. Unfortunately, the
folks in charge (who make the Cheapass folks seem like geniuses)
decided to release Boosters two weeks before the Starters, which
contain both the new rules and the vital cards to play the new
faction. "Wow! Look at all these cool cards I got! I can't wait to
play with them...D'OH!"
That's it for this month. Thanks once again to our lovely and
talented hostess, Nurse Roberts, for donating valuable electrons to
feed my psychosis. See you next month.
